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It's a Jersey Thing

by Jason Didner

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missjulie54
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missjulie54 I am a Fan of Jason's Music. I have always been a Fan of Eddie & The Cruisers Movies & The RHONJ. I would live to vacation on the Jershey Shore some day. Favorite track: You Can't Get There from Here in Jersey.
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1.
There goes the diner In the left-hand lane 'Cross that divider Ain't that a pain? Now I gotta go three miles east just to come back west Man, this puts my patience to the test You can't get there from here in Jersey You're always on the wrong side of the road You can't get there from here in Jersey I've got a case of jug handle turnaround overload Bumper to bumper Ain't this a wreck? That fender bender Them rubber necks Now I gotta wait half hour more just to get a mile Man, this puts them cramps into my style You can't get there from here in Jersey You're always on the side that doesn't move You can't get there from here in Jersey 'Til you get off, no way the traffic will improve I'm going crazy In my steel cage This roadway madness Is all the rage Now I can kiss the exit lane goodbye They'd sooner crash than let you by You can't get there from here in Jersey You're always far from where you need to be You can't get there from here in Jersey I'll be home tomorrow, no use waitin' up for me There goes my exit And I'm running late I'm going in circles Around the state Now I've gotta go ten miles north just to come back south Man, this leaves a bad taste in my mouth You can't get there from here in Jersey You're always on the wrong side of the way You can't get there from here in Jersey No U-turn here, I'd better find a place to stay You can't get there from here in Jersey I've been too long behind this safety glass You can't get there from here in Jersey Hey there buddy, you can kiss my...E-Z pass
2.
More than eighty million years ago Before the Turnpike came to be Down off Exit 4 on that famous road In the swamps of old south Jersey Dinosaurs as big as buses That didn't have to pay tolls They could turn left wherever they wanted That's how these huge lizards rolled Chorus: Back when we had hadrosaurs The Jersey dinosaurs (Whoah!) We had hadrosaurs Our very own Jersey dinosaurs (Whoah oh oh oh oh!) Verse 2: Oh, these hadrosaurs were grazers Livin’ on grass and low lying leaves See, they had no Dino diners To get Taylor ham, egg and cheese (It's a Jersey thing!) They loved sunshine and water From Cape May to Seaside Heights Long before there was a boardwalk Tilt-a-Whirls or water slides Chorus Bridge: They raised their noisy high pitched roars While defending land and food These late, great Garden State hadrosaurs Had Jersey attitude! Chorus Outro (repeat chorus pattern 4x)
3.
Cubicle 03:16
Here in my cubicle I try to get the project done Until I get a visitor Who starts me over back at square one Here in my cubicle The phone rings off of the ugly green wall Whoops! Here comes the manager I pray it’s not a personal call I collate and I staple I make the mailing labels My degree is on their file They call this entry level I’m running into deadline trouble It has to get done on the double I type til I get carpal tunnel In my cubicle Here in my cubicle I’m checking for the mistakes Everything looks all right Now I’ve got time for a five-minute lunch break Here in my cubicle I play computer solitaire Whoops! Here comes the president He’s talking to the engineer, he says… This is our opportunity I say we downsize the company I recommend the strategy Trim the office and the factory Quick! Better close the file They’re coming up my aisle Gulp down my Adam’s apple (GULP!) Methinks me job’s in trouble (Water cooler/happy hour chatter) WHAT! Reogranization?!? Reorganization?!!!?!?! I can’t believe how swift They canned the second shift They gave us lovely parting gifts, but Now I find myself adrift I wear a nametag and a funny hat Would you like some fries with that I wish that I was back…. In my cubicle
4.
There’s no clock in this gambling house No window on the fading light of day My better judgment says “Get up, get out” But greed is standing in the way, yeah My lucky hands, they held the winning cards I felt the ride would never end Who thought saying no would be so hard When you think a win’s around the bend So have you got a couple bucks to lend? Green light, go for the money, Now I’m running through the red I’ve had my run on the table, Now I’m in above my head I was sittin’ pretty But now I’m broke instead I’m telling you I should have Quit while I was ahead My next big win is on the credit card I’ve got to make back everything I lost This ain’t no foolin’ now, I’m playin’ hard I will break even at all costs, yeah I was the highest roller in the place I pushed my luck a little bit to far I’ve got to get myself back in the race And play the chips on one more lucky star, yeah So how much would you pay to buy my car? Green light, go for the money, Now I’m running through the red I’ve had my run on the table, Now I’m in above my head I was sittin’ pretty But now I’m broke instead I’m telling you I should have Quit while I was ahead Better quit, better quit while you’re ahead Quit while you’re ahead Better quit, better quit while you’re ahead Quit while you’re ahead Better quit, better quit while you’re ahead Quit while you’re ahead Better quit, better quit I'm starting to think those free drinks weren't free...
5.
When you come to a fork in the road Take it to the Jackals Den It's deja vu all over again Hear the crack of the bat on the ball See the pack run with the wind It's on when the red and black dig in We're the overwhelming underdogs With a taste for victory The full moon's rising, the crowd lets out a howl And it gets late early with Jackals on the prowl It ain't over 'til it's over, we don't throw in the towel We got bases loaded with Jackals on the prowl We're Jackals on the prowl See a perfect double play Hear the trumpet's battle cry Then watch the rockets light the sky You've got the best seat in the house To watch the innings roll on by And hang with these dogs that never say die We're the overwhelming underdogs With a taste for victory The full moon's rising, the crowd lets out a howl And it gets late early with Jackals on the prowl It ain't over 'til it's over, we don't throw in the towel We got bases loaded with Jackals on the prowl We're Jackals on the prowl And Jack pumps his paws up in the air We're rocking' Yogi's ballpark at Montclair The full moon's rising, the crowd lets out a howl And it gets late early with Jackals on the prowl It ain't over 'til it's over, we don't throw in the towel We got bases loaded with Jackals on the prowl We're Jackals on the prowl Bases jammed with Jackals on the prowl Come on, drive us in
6.
What does Santa do in the summertime When there are waves to surf in the warm sunshine? Does he kick off his tall black winter boots And put on a red and white bathing suit? Does he play skee ball in the boardwalk arcade And go with Mrs. Claus for a walk in the shade? Chorus: Summertime Santa down the shore Serving up treats in the ice cream store Riding around on his bicycle Away from the arctic icicles Summertime Santa, Summertime Santa I'm glad you're on vacation with me What does Santa do on a summer day? Does he fly with a banner behind his sleigh To remind the kids to share their beach toys Does he play volleyball with nice girls and boys? Does he hang up his big red winter coat And take time to unwind on his fishing boat Chorus The crashing waves sound wonderful When mixed with Santa’s bells And the merry sounds of laughter ‘round the carousel Chorus
7.
Verse 1: Windshield wipers are frozen and it's hard to see If there's dangerous obstacles in front of me It's a slippery turnpike and the left lane's out These times can test your grip on what your life's about In my engine the gremlins knock my self esteem As they try to drive down the value of my dreams As I struggle for traction up this icy hill They make me think dark thoughts but they can't break my will Chorus: Let's move on forward, here's to making our way To the dreams we work for coming into reach Salt and sand on this icy highway Will be salt and sand on a summer beach Salt and sand on this icy highway Will be salt and sand on a summer beach Verse 2: I can feel your frustration as you spin your wheels I'm identifying big-time with the way you feel You set your plan and watch it get pushed back It takes a steady hand to get you back on track Yeah the heat of anger may move us along But it ain't no substitute for staying strong Today we won't be quickly satisfied But we've got dreams of a lifetime that won't be denied Chorus Bridge: We can fade Or we can shine The way we choose to walk the line Chorus
8.
9.
There goes the diner In the left-hand lane 'Cross that divider Ain't that a pain? Now I gotta go three miles east just to come back west Man, this puts my patience to the test You can't get there from here in Jersey You're always on the wrong side of the road You can't get there from here in Jersey I've got a case of jug handle turnaround overload Bumper to bumper Ain't this a wreck? That fender bender Them rubber necks Now I gotta wait half hour more just to get a mile Man, this puts them cramps into my style You can't get there from here in Jersey You're always on the side that doesn't move You can't get there from here in Jersey 'Til you get off, no way the traffic will improve I'm going crazy In my steel cage This roadway madness Is all the rage Now I can kiss the exit lane goodbye They'd sooner crash than let you by You can't get there from here in Jersey You're always far from where you need to be You can't get there from here in Jersey I'll be home tomorrow, no use waitin' up for me There goes my exit And I'm running late I'm going in circles Around the state Now I've gotta go ten miles north just to come back south Man, this leaves a bad taste in my mouth You can't get there from here in Jersey You're always on the wrong side of the way You can't get there from here in Jersey No U-turn here, I'd better find a place to stay You can't get there from here in Jersey I've been too long behind this safety glass You can't get there from here in Jersey Hey there buddy, you can kiss my...E-Z pass
10.
When you come to the great waterfall You're right near the Jackals den The ballgame's back in Paterson again Hear the crack of the bat on the ball See the pack run with the wind It's on when the red and black dig in We're the Silk City diamond dogs With a taste for victory The full moon's rising, the fans let out a howl And there's Jack high fivin' for Jackals on the prowl Whoever's on first, we don't throw in the towel We got bases loaded with Jackals on the prowl We're Jackals on the prowl See a perfect double play Hear the trumpet's battle cry Then watch the rockets light the sky You've got the best seat in the house To watch the innings roll on by And hang with the dogs that never say die We're the Silk City diamond dogs With a taste for victory The full moon's rising, the fans let out a howl And there's Jack high fivin' for Jackals on the prowl Whoever's on first, we don't throw in the towel We got bases loaded with Jackals on the prowl We're Jackals on the prowl We're rocking in the house of Cool Papa Bell It’s Doby, Satch and Gibson's field as well Oooh ohhh The full moon's rising, the fans let out a howl And there's Jack high fivin' for Jackals on the prowl Whoever's on first, we don't throw in the towel We got bases loaded with Jackals on the prowl We're Jackals on the prowl

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A compilation of my 25 years+ of writing and recording songs filled with Jersey humor and my experiences in the Garden State.

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released July 15, 2022

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Jason Didner Montclair, New Jersey

Jason's body of work as a singer/songwriter/multi-instrumentalist has grown diverse, representing his nature and lived experience. He's brought his sense of humor to bear in many of his signature tracks over the past 25+ years.

He's also turned to song to support the mental health of his listeners, his family and himself. They're mantras for waking up grateful and optimistic.
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